Trying to evolve

I'm sitting at the kitchen table, the weather is phenomenal--sun is shining, wind is blowing, temperature not too hot and certainly not too cold. House is quiet, Hannah is playing, Emily is crafting, Ray is watching football. It couldn't be more perfect right at this moment.

But, I have lots hanging over my head...papers to be graded, Progress Book to be updated, house to be cleaned, grocery shopping to be done, laundry to be folded, projects everywhere to be finished, soccer games to attend...ugh.

It's so hard to enjoy moments like these when so much is left undone.

But I have made a promise to myself to evolve, to become better than I am now--physically, mentally, emotionally. I know people think I should slow down and appreciate what I have, and I do. But, I don't want to waste a single minute that I have here in this life. And, I don't want to become stagnant. So, I'm not embarking on this new pursuit because I'm unhappy with where I'm at or with what I have; I just feel the need to change, to evolve.

I want to be healthy. Every day brings a new high or a new low with my energy levels and it is very frustrating to live life like that. Most of the time, I feel like I am sleepwalking through life. But right now, the only thing I'm doing to combat that is taking a little pill twice a day. I can do more. I can work out; I can eat right; I can get more rest each night. So, number one on my list is to improve my health.

I want to be organized. Back in January, I chose "organize" as my word of the year, and I have taken great strides in becoming more organized both at home and at work. But, there is more I can do. Being organized takes so much weight off my shoulders it's just silly not to invest time in this area. So, becoming more organized is number two on my list.

I want to be a better mom and a better wife. I didn't make this number one on my list because I feel that by improving my health and becoming more organized will naturally make me a better mom and wife because I won't be so irritable and I can work on developing more patience with the people I live with.

I want to be a better teacher.

I want to change up my look. Be a bit edgier, a bit sexier.

And finally, I want to be grounded. I want to deepen my faith and just give myself time to be me and to explore my hobbies.

I know that reading a post like this gets boring and almost cliche, but it is my blog, and this is how I feel, and I wanted to make my intentions public to keep me accountable. Hopefully, in the next few months, the me that is lurking under the surface will make her way to the top.