Viewer Discretion is Advised

As mentioned in an earlier post, I've really been thinking about throwing my knapsack over the wall. I thought deciding to enter a scrapbook contest was the thing for me to do, but that contest has been put on hold. So, I've decided I'm going to be honest and up front about my physique.

I'm very much out of shape. Right now I weigh 124 pounds. That's not bad, I know. For 5'5" and 38 years old, that's pretty good. But remember, I said I was out of shape not fat. The embarrassing part is that I am at 25% body fat. I realize that that means I'm only 1/4 fat, but 25% is the far end of "normal". I don't want to be just "normal." I read that to be "fit" to be "lean" I would need to be around 19-22% body fat. My goal is to be at 20% by Christmas.

I only focused on my weight--not muscle--all summer because the steroids I was taking causes people to gain weight. As my doctor put it, "You blow up like a chipmunk." You also cannot lose weight while taking them. I was so adamant about not gaining any weight. And, I didn't. But, it came with consequences. I'm now "skinny fat." And I hate it. I am ashamed. Now that I am no longer taking that steroid, it is time to get the physique I've always wanted.

So, why did I say, "Viewer Discretion is Advised"? Well, what you will see next will be a bit appalling, but I wanted to stop hiding. I want "everyone" to know what I really look like. What I look like when I'm not sucking it in or dressing to disguise it...Ready????

Gross, isn't it??? ;-)

(Sorry about the open drawers in the pictures. I had been digging through them to find something to wear in the picture and forgot to close them!)

But, did you check out the back fat in that picture?? How about my butt that's trying to reach the back of my knees? Or, the inner thighs that don't let the light of day shine through them?

See, I can hide it. I'm just tired of doing so. And please, no comments like "You don't look bad" because, as we can all plainly see, yes I do! ;-)